How it works

From hello to “I do”

Almost every couple asks how this actually works. Here's the whole process, beginning to end: what happens when, what I'll ask you, and the few practical things you'll need to take care of.

Nothing here is complicated, and our first conversation is always free.

See ceremony fees

The process

Five unhurried steps

  1. One

    Say hello

    Contact me with your date and where you’re celebrating, whichever way suits you: text, email or the form. I’ll check my calendar and get back to you within a day or two, either way.

    • Helpful to include: your names, your date, your venue or city
    • If I'm already booked, I'll gladly introduce you to a trusted colleague
  2. Two

    We talk, at no cost

    We'll sit down together, in person or by video, for an unhurried conversation. There's no obligation at the end of it, and many couples find this is the moment they know.

    • How you met, and what you love about each other
    • What you believe, what you don't, and what your families expect
    • Anything you're worried about: a difficult relative, a nervous reader, a tradition you're unsure how to include
    • Your questions for me, about anything at all
    • If we decide we're a good match, I'll send you a contract to book your date
  3. Three

    I write your ceremony

    Then I go away and write. Your ceremony is built from your story and the elements you've chosen, never from a template, and you'll see it well before the day.

    • I'll walk you through how ceremonies usually flow, so nothing is a mystery
    • You'll get a full draft to read together, out loud if you can
    • We revise as many times as it takes, until every line sounds like you
    • If you're writing your own vows, I'll help you shape them
  4. Four

    Your wedding day

    I arrive early, find you both, and take care of the ceremony so you don't have to think about it.

    • I'll greet your family and coordinate with your photographer and musicians
    • We'll sign your marriage license with your two witnesses
  5. Five

    Afterwards

    I return your signed license to the Register of Deeds that issued it, so the paperwork is handled while you're away celebrating.

    • You'll receive a copy of your ceremony to keep
Check Your Date
“Love is the bridge between you and everything.”
Rumi · Sufi poet
A bride laughing during her waterfront ceremony as her groom gestures to their guests
No two ceremonies have ever been alike.

The shape of a ceremony

What actually happens up there

Most couples have never planned a ceremony before, and nobody expects you to know the parts. There are no required components, only the ones that mean something to you. A ceremony often goes something like this:

  1. The processional, as you walk in
  2. A welcome, and why we're all here
  3. A reading or two, from anyone you'd like
  4. Your story, told the way you told it to me
  5. A reflection on marriage, or a blessing
  6. An optional ritual, if you've chosen one
  7. Your vows to each other
  8. The rings
  9. The pronouncement
  10. The kiss, and the recessional

Most of my ceremonies run about twenty to twenty-five minutes. Yours can include all of this, or almost none of it.

See the rituals you might include
Rev. Christie officiating beneath a draped pergola with a chandelier in a pine forest
A forest clearing, under a chandelier.

Good to know

The practical questions couples ask

  • When should we reach out? As early as you like. Many couples book six months to a year ahead, but I've written beautiful ceremonies on much shorter notice.
  • Do you come to the rehearsal? As a general rule, no. I believe there's something sacred about hearing and saying your vows for the very first time during the ceremony itself.
  • What if it rains? We'll talk through your backup plan in advance, so nobody has to make decisions in a downpour.
  • Can our priest or rabbi take part? Yes, gladly. I've co-officiated many times, and I enjoy it very much.
  • Can friends and family read or sing? Always. I'll help them know exactly when to step up and what to do.
  • How far do you travel? Anywhere within about an hour of the Triangle.
More questions, answered

Paperwork, briefly

Your North Carolina marriage license

This is the one errand only the two of you can run. It's straightforward, and I'll handle everything after the ceremony.

  1. One

    You apply together

    Any of North Carolina's 100 Register of Deeds offices can issue your license, and it can be used anywhere in the state. You'll both need to go in person with your ID.

  2. Two

    Mind the 60 days

    A license can be used right away, and it's good for 60 days. Applying about a month before the wedding is a comfortable window.

  3. Three

    Bring it on the day

    Hand it to me before the ceremony. We'll sign it with your two witnesses, and I'll return it to the county that issued it.

Wake County: apply for a marriage license

Kind words

What the day felt like

Our wedding day seemed to pass like a whirlwind after the ceremony, and we didn't have a chance to properly thank you.

Phil and I thought the ceremony was absolutely lovely and we couldn't have asked for a better officiant. You were amazing! The ceremony was beautifully written and executed. We are incredibly thankful to you for helping to make our day so special.

Tina & Phil

Let's begin

Step one is the easy part

Send me your date and where you're celebrating, and I'll check my calendar. Everything after that, we'll do together.

Check Your Date See the ceremonies

Based in Raleigh · Serving Raleigh, Durham, Chapel Hill and anywhere within about an hour

Text Christie Check Date